Fletching

Today was a good day for ‘scaping.

I started out by going through some of the daily challenges. You may remember this from the time I buried however-many bones and got some monies. Well, today the challenges were to do the Burthrope obstacle course eight times, string eight short bows, and burn 10 Normal logs. CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.

Burning logs like a boss.

Burning logs like a boss.

Let’s just say, fifteen minutes later I was 3k gps richer and all sorts of experience levels were gained. After that it was kind of boring. I ran over to the Tree Gnome Stronghold to do that obstacle course over there.

Eventually I got bored and since I was in World 1 there were about 300 people mulling about doing their own thing. Off to World 3! Lumbridge was bumpin’! I popped in on a conversation where some girl was complaining about the phrase”YOLO.” I, of course, had to interject stating that it was alright to use the cliché if one were using it ironically. I think the topic came up because there was a guy there by the name of YOLO HOSE. I’m not sure if he meant is to be pronounced like “JOSÉ” or “HOSE” like the garden hose. We just called him YOLO. Someone was emoting themselves to throw sand at him while yelling “Saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand!” It was good fun. Eventually, one woman named YogitheBear came up to me and actually thought I was funny. That’s right. Someone enjoyed what I had to say. It was a beautiful moment in Potam history. At one point in time people were mentioning their ages, YOLO was 19 and Yogi was 29. All of the sudden YOLO started getting all hostile toward Yogi. He was bashign her for being 29 and playing RS.

This was my exact facial expression.

What a punk! She can play whatever the hell she wants to. He told her to get a life but she had a husband and a daughter AND she worked full time. I asked YOLO to stop being a troll. Nobody messes with people who think I’m funny. I gotta defend my peoples, guys. He continued on being an ass even though Yogi continued to make valid points. He then tried to pull the, “I’m working so-many nights a week in addition to another job so even though you’re a mother and work full time, you’ve got nothing on me.” Is this kid for cereal?! I just… I can’t even… Ugh. Fine YOLO. I’ll do this dance with you, but I won’t enjoy it.

Ricky was there, too. If you don’t remember him from this post, he’s the salmon-colored short-wearing person with the feather in his hat. We’re bros. But, he forgot about me. Apparently I didn’t make enough of an impression on him. Damn.

Eventually Yogi got tired of YOLO’s pestering and left. YOLO, after finding out he had no one else to bully left as well. I really hope he’s dumb enough to follow someone into the Wildy. After that, the conversation died out until it was just Ricky and I hanging out. We had some pretty decent conversations for RS. I commented on his nice salmon Chubbies and he commented on the fact that I could speak articulately (sometimes a rarity in the gaming world). We were bros once more. I explained how I kinda-sorta knew him but he didn’t remember me because he frequents the populated worlds quite a bit and meets all sorts of people.

From left to right: MickellBerry, RoyalBlonde, Ricky, and Potam

From left to right: MickellBerry, RoyalBlonde, Ricky, and Potam
That random guy in the back never said anything.

I asked him about what his favorite conversation with someone was about an he told me it was about having a four-some with the NPC, Nastroth. Oh and once he found out I was a girl, without fail, he asked me what a vagina looked like. Classic. Real classic. I told him, “a mushy taco.” That shut hm up, real quick-like. Soon our conversation of two increased to three and then four with the addition of two gentlemen named RoyalBlonde and MickellBerry. We exchanged some friendly banter for some time until we decided to move from the left side of the Lumbridge castle gates to the right. There was an entirely new group of people over there having their own conversation oddly enough about tentacle porn. Yeah. RuneScape. Full of weird people talking about weird shit. All. Day. Long.

There was a guy with a giant hand on a stick. Like, what? Yeah.

There was a guy with a giant hand on a stick. Like, what? Yeah.

Soon we were having a party right there on the Lumbridge Castle lawn. There was Rudro12, bearman332 (who loved to talk about poop), Slendahhman, and I Luv Grama. (I asked her if “Grama” stood for grandma or grammar but she never clarified.) Ricky then asked me if I ever tried eating those scented erasers when I was a child, I said no but I did try chapstick. Apparently he was all about those scented candles. People are weird. Slendahhman then began talking about how masturbation was gross and Ricky chimed in saying he frowned upon it. All of the sudden some guy named Pyrastan walked over and was telling us about how he was hotboxing Lumbridge and then challenged everyone to see who was higher. I threw out an idea: whomever could say the most philosophical thing won. Immediately RoyalBlonde was claiming he was the “seeker of a magical placenta” and said, “I live in the placenta.” Well. That happened. Oh, don’t worry the night continues on its way with a guy dressed as a giant chicken named Delph4Jesus. He was imploring everyone to repent and make way for Jesus. After that I had to say goodnight. The chicken got me.

DA KR3W

DA KR3W

 

 

 

 

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Categories: Agility, Burthorpe, f2p, Firemaking, Fletching, Lumbridge, p2p, Woodcutting | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Let’s begin, shall we?

Alright so after you get all signed up and you lie about reading the terms and conditions you are good to go. Just get all logged in and click the massive gold button labelled “PLAY.”

It's pretty self-explanatory.

It’s pretty self-explanatory.

You start off by choosing a female or male. (If later you decide you want to change genders you can always go to the Make-over Mage by Falador. This is available in both f2p and p2p worlds.) Then you choose the basic theme of their clothing. You have several options and you can choose anything from a warrior to a thief. When you’re done, click the green “Continue” button to move on.

Some outfits have sub-categories as seen here under the "Adventurer theme."

Some outfits have sub-categories as seen here under the “Adventurer theme.”

Next you’ll have several more decisions to make such as the hair style and color, the shirt style and color, the pant style and color, as well as the boot style and color. There will be a model of your character off to the right of the window to preview before you make your final decisions. Once again, when you’re done, click continue.

That was easy enough. Now it’s time to choose your name. Keep in mind that once you finalize your gamer tag, there is no take-backs. You’re stuck with what you have. Also, when it comes to your decision making, you can try to be clever but chances are that name has already been taken to be prepared to add a few numbers. If you think that’s a tacky look, then you’re going to have to try a lot harder. Like I mentioned in my previous post, I named my character Potam because I saw it in a CAPTCHA. I started out by looking up medieval name generators but then I got lazy. You should try to be more creative than that. If you’re also lazy, here are a few sites to get your creative juices flowing:

Once you hit continue, you’re going to finally get to do some serious clicking. This next part of your RuneScape journey is going to take some time, it took me about two hours to get through everything and I’m a veteran. They’ve changed the tutorial process a LOT over the past few years. You used to only have to fight this dragon and help this one warrior. You’d be let into the big leagues with no idea how to do anything except eat cabbage and swing your fists.

My original character is a little bit of everything but for Potam, I decided the bow.

My original character is a little bit of everything but for Potam, I decided the bow.

Potam is going to point out some interesting things about the tutorial process. She’s not going to walk you through it because it would defeat the purpose of the tutorial. I will, however, give you a brief preview of the end of the first cut scene. You must choose your weapon. There is no real advantage of one weapon over the other so just pick whatever suits your fancy.

The tutorial is essentially a series of tasks. You’re character is in the center of the screen; you can change your point of view by moving the arrow keys. There will be a yellow circle around your feet with a line of yellow dots leading you to your first task. Don’t worry, you are walked through EVERYTHING in the tutorial section of your journey so don’t worry about getting lost or confused. (Hint: Use an actual mouse instead of a track pad. This makes handling your character MUCH easier.)

There is even an arrow if you don't believe the dots.

There is even an arrow if you don’t believe the dots.

During the tutorial you will be asked to pickpocket pompous traders, bake disgusting pies, save a woman’s daughter from drowning, and numerous other ways RuneScape tricks you into earning xp (experience points used for leveling up) and teaching you crafting techniques. If you’re into poor humor, you’ll love the conversations you have with some of the NPCs (Non-player characters, or characters that RuneScape had built into the software for you to interact with) they’re great. Some of them are serious but others are like the stereotypical parent trying to tell a dirty joke to seem “hip.”

Make sure, when you’re playing this that your computer can handle the energy draw. I decided to run RuneScape, iTunes, Chrome, my e-mail, and Microsoft Word all at the same time and my game crashed. If this ever happens to you, don’t worry. When you log back on you’re right where you left off. There is no concept of “save” points in RuneScape so you never have to worry about losing the last hour or so of progress. Whew.

It's great.

It’s great.

So, after leveling up, killing some trolls, conjuring up your first spirit wolf, and fletching some arrows you’re finally inducted into knighthood.

There’s this huge ceremony and confetti and knights and a person with a scar and clapping and there is much rejoicing. At the end of every post where I record Potam actually does something I will post three screen shots: my inventory, my skill chart, and where I am on the map. This will pose as data and represent how far Potam has evolved as a character.

Categories: f2p, Fletching, p2p, Quests, Skills, Thieving, Tutorial | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

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